May 2, 2013
It is the wee hours of the 2nd day of May in the year of our Lord, 2013. I have had no breakfast, no coffee, nary even a sip of water because, on this May the 2nd, it is strictly forbidden. Lest you think I have entered some holy, consecrated fast, allow me to put that thought to rest. In all of Christendom - a more troublesome, unwilling, unenthusiastic, rebellious, and cranky "faster" could not be found than in moi. This is no fast of choice. These are the bloodless directives from a sheet of paper attached to my calendar with the bland heading: "Instructions For Surgery." The very first line of these instructions read as such: Nothing to eat or drink prior to surgery (includes water, gum, ice chips, lozenges). It is a Garden of Eden moment. I am now fixated on ice chips. The snake whispers: "The doctor said chips...but what about a chip? Surely one chip will do no harm? Come my pretty...the fridge is only five small steps away ."
On this beautiful spring morning (and we have had precious few this year) I am marking the last few moments before my wife entrusts me to the care of perfect strangers. At least I hope they are perfect , because, for a few hours, they will be given free rein to poke, prod, cut, snip, sew and comment on my unconscious body - specifically the region of my beloved and much abused right shoulder. The surgeon is a Harvard man, both undergrad and Med. school. It seemed prudent. Harvard has produced many of our nation's greatest leaders and not a few Presidents. Moreover, because these Harvard alums have done such a superb job of guiding our country my thinking was..
Uh-oh...
Anyway, just thought I'd take these waning moments while I still have two arms to arm you with a bit of bible trivia regarding the right shoulder. In the bloody days of animal sacrifice practiced by our Hebrew forefathers, the right shoulder of the offered animal was called the "terumah gedola" , or literally the "great offering." You will see it also referred to as the "heave offering." This was the first portion, the tithe, the best of the animal. After it was offered to Yahweh, then it became the provision of food for the High Priest, their families and the servants. Here we go: He among the sons of Aaron, that offereth the blood of the peace offerings, and the fat, shall have the right shoulder for his part. For the wave breast and the heave shoulder have I taken of the children of Israel from off the sacrifices of their peace offerings, and have given them unto Aaron the priest and unto his sons by a statute for ever from among the children of Israel. Leviticus 7:33,34.
What do we surmise from all of this? The right shoulder was a big deal then and by golly it is a big deal this morning! As I sit here, dry mouthed, with a growling stomach, reading about priests munching savory right shoulder parts - that's pretty much all I have. Right shoulders are a big deal.
Granted, this post is not the level of profundity you may be used to but the distractions are now pouring in and my senses are all jawing at one another. My wife is shuffling about, grinding coffee beans and perking the lovely brew which she will soon enjoy. I must take leave of this post or risk forbidden coffee breath on the operating table.
Your prayers appreciated! – CJ